Listening, Learning, and Loving Through the Transition
It was a good thing I worked with a group of women who had been mothers for a lot longer than I had, and who were kind enough to share guidance, advice and the benefits of their experience with me as I floundered through my first few years of motherhood.
At one point, one of them asked if I had enrolled my son in school yet. I shook my head and replied, “No, he’s only 5.”
She gently reminded me that this was, indeed, the correct age to attend kindergarten.
This was back in the days before preschool was available. Thank goodness, because I guess my child would have been considered a truant.
These days, of course, children are eligible to attend preschool as early as age 3 or 4, depending on certain qualifications. Young mothers reading this issue of Owensboro Parent Magazine are more fortunate than I was, as this issue provides information on all local preschool options available to them.
But there is one other important tip that I would like to pass along, in the same spirit as was shown to me by those veteran moms all those years ago.
I encourage all parents and guardians who are preparing their child for preschool to remember one thing: Put yourself in their little shoes.
Not literally, of course (unless you have the feet of an elf). No, what I mean by that is, try to remember what it was like when you were a child. How did you feel, what were your fears and concerns?
Of course, we as the trusted adults in our children’s lives want to set a positive example of excitement and enthusiasm about school. We want to talk about the fun they will have, the friends they will make, the things they will learn.
But kids sometimes focus on things we never think about – or have forgotten.
What if I have to go to the bathroom?
What if I can’t find my classroom?
What if nobody likes me?
What if I get lost in the hallway?
What if I lose my backpack?
What if I get on the wrong bus?
What if I don’t like what they serve for lunch?
What if everybody else already knows how to read?
What if there is a monster in the cubby?
What if I sit next to a mean kid who calls me names when the teacher isn’t looking?
If possible, try to let the child visit the school and see the classroom before the first day of school. Remind them that teachers and other nice people will take care of them throughout the day and will make sure they get on the right bus. Assure them that there will be plenty of opportunities to go to the bathroom – and that it is fine to raise their hand if an emergency arises.
New clothes for the first day of school are nice, and a time-honored tradition, but the child may be more comfortable wearing a favorite outfit that is comfortable and familiar. Perhaps a small token of reassurance – a little stuffed animal, maybe – can be tucked into the child’s desk, available to be petted or held if the child becomes anxious.
Yes, by all means, talk to your child and describe what going to school looks like and what will happen. But don’t forget to listen too. Encourage your child to share his or her questions.
No doubt, your child will be cared for by a kind and loving teacher – but parents and guardians are the first and best teachers in a child’s life. So embrace the preschool experience at home and encourage your child to ask questions. That’s what learning is all about!
