By: Christy Ramey
A few years ago we had the opportunity to invite one of my son’s friends to our Thanksgiving meal. He was so excited to come because he had never had “Thanksgiving” at his house. His grandparents lived out of town and his mother, a waitress, always worked on Thanksgiving. This child who was nine years old ate so many helpings of corn and potatoes; I lost count! Of course, I wasn’t counting, but it was exciting to see his enthusiasm for the meal. Can you imagine life without Thanksgiving? Think of all the memories we have stored, the blessings we have shared and the food we have eaten on this one holiday. So how do we make it possible for those memories, blessings and food to be shared with others? How do we give our children the blessings that come from being thankful? Research shows that thankful people have higher vitality, more optimism, less stress and less depression than the population as a whole. Isn’t that a wonderful legacy to leave our children? Teaching them to be thankful can make them happier and healthier!
So where do we start in leaving this all important legacy to our children?
First, look at your own example. Are you a thankful person? Do you accentuate the positive; see your glass as half full rather than half empty? Using thankfulness terms like grateful, blessed, appreciative and thankful, allow children to develop a “thankfulness” vocabulary. A family meal routine allows us the opportunity to talk about what we are thankful for on a regular basis. Keeping a thankful spirit in the home can produce a peaceful environment.
While you are talking, explain to children everything that someone (mom, grandma, or dad) has to do to prepare a big meal. It doesn’t have to be the Thanksgiving meal. The planning, shopping, cooking, and cleaning all take time. Calling attention to the amount of time, energy, and effort it takes to put a meal on the table will help them be observant on other occasions and in other peoples’ homes. Saying “thank you” to the person who is responsible for the food preparation should be a habit.
Get kids in the kitchen! Maybe not on Thanksgiving Day, but the day or week before they could help with shopping (pick up extra food for Thanksgiving baskets at school or church). In the kitchen let them chop, crush, mix, toss, or just open bags and containers to get things started. They can also set the table, which is a fun activity and can be done ahead of time.
Invite a friend or co-worker who would not have an opportunity to participate in their own Thanksgiving dinner. Discuss this as a family; you will probably be able to think of someone that would enjoy celebrating Thanksgiving with you. Remember to be open to your child’s suggestions. You can’t feed an army, but it could make a difference in someone’s day or life!
Fix a meal for a shut-in or neighbor who can’t get out. Children can bake cookies, or make a cake and deliver it. The prep is a learning experience, but the giving involved is an unforgettable experience. Then make a special effort to show your appreciation to your child or children for their willingness to help others. Ask them how it made them feel?
Before the actual Thanksgiving dinner, ask your children to give all the guests a slip of paper to record for what they are most thankful for. Then right after the meal have someone read what was written. Google a “Thanksgiving Tree” to find all kinds of creative ways to do this activity. One year, I spray painted a branch gold, put it in a pot filled with flowers, then tied each strip of paper on the branches. Your children may want to make this a family tradition!
However you celebrate t
he Thanksgiving season, remember that thankfulness is more a state of being, not just a single day of the year. Encouraging children to be thankful is a year-round challenge. Remember that teaching the trait of thankfulness leaves a legacy of good health and happiness for your child’s future.