By: Lora Wimsatt
The day everyone takes Dad out to eat … and he picks up the check. Or the family holds a cookout … with Dad at the grill.
But that’s the way Dad wants it.
Ask any guy how he felt when his wife first announces the news – “We’re going to have a baby” – and chances are, he’ll say his emotions were a mix of excitement … and fear.
A lot of men are overwhelmed as they realize they will be responsible for raising a baby – a child.
For some new fathers, this is an opportunity to relate to their own dads in a new way. One young father said it this way: “I had a newfound appreciation for my Dad. I’m sure he felt anxiety through the years, but as a child, I can say I never felt that or sensed that from him. I began to also reflect on the things he taught me, by word and by deed, and then how large a responsibility I felt in attempting to do the same for my children.”
For other men, however, the trepidation of impending fatherhood is increased because they didn’t have a close relationship with their own dad, or their father was not involved in their lives.
“Me and my dad didn’t ever have a strong relationship, so one thing I want to do is make sure my daughter knows she can tell me anything, no matter what it is, and I will always be there for her,” said one first-time dad.
Another young dad said he learned one positive thing from an absent father: “It showed me how I didn’t want to be,” he said simply.
Men who previously considered their most important job around the house to be taking out the trash once a week now say, “The biggest responsibility of being a father is teaching what’s right and what’s wrong, and for my child to grow up and know how important family is.”
“I began to think about how great my parents were and how big those ‘parent shoes’ must be,” another man said. “For the first time in my life, a little person was going to look to me for their every need – what an awesome responsibility this was and is!”
Dads quickly realize that their children depend on them for more than food, clothing and shelter – little ones also learn important “life lessons” from Daddy. That prompted one father to reflect: “I want my children to live by the Golden Rule – ‘treat others as you would like to be treated yourself.’ I make the effort to live life this way, and honestly, I’m not as close to perfecting this as I want to be. But I’d want my children to know this about me in an effort that they would live this out in their own lives as they grow up and mature into adults.”
Being a “Daddy” changes everything. As one man said: “It makes me excited every day I get to wake up and see her little face in the morning. Now there is never a day I am down because I know when I get home, she will be there waiting for her Daddy.”
One of the best ways a man can take care of his children is by taking care of their mother, as shared by this Daddy: “The one thing I want my daughter to know is that her mother is the most loving and caring person I have ever met in my life, and that her father is a lucky person to have married her mom. We have the best child in the world and we love watching her grow every day.”
There is a special relationship between fathers and sons as the dad sets the expectation for what kind of man he wants his son to be. However, those blessed with daughters quickly discover that “Daddy’s Little Girl” has taken over his heart.
“I have always believed that a father sets the example for who a man should be and how he should act, especially toward a woman,” says the father of two girls. “I constantly remind myself that my relationship with my daughters will have a great impact on what they look for and expect in a man.”
Although many men struggle to put their feelings into words, the love for their children comes through.
“My little girl is the best thing that ever happened to me,” said a first-time Daddy.
Even though the lifelong adventure of fatherhood might begin with uncertainty, many men find guidance in remembering their priorities: “I learned that a Dad has to have a heart that seeks to please God first in his life. If my kids can say their Dad tries very hard to please God, then I’ll consider my role as a Dad a success. All the other ‘Dad qualities’ hinge off of this one.”
One Dad said it all when he replied, “I love my children more than life itself and I consider them a gift from God.”
Even if that gift involves grilling your own burgers on Father’s Day. .
Lora Wimsatt is a mother, grandmother and writer. She enjoys the everyday blessings and adventures of life, especially her family.